Maybe its FATE

A.

The heater in my house broke down and I have been bathing in extreme cold waters in early mornings and late nights for the past few days.... I screamed and I yelled, then relaxed..

If daddio still doesnt replace it, I think I might be able to dive in Bali cold waters in just one rashie. LOL.

Let's pray daddio will replace that, because I still like hot steamy baths.

over-tire

A.

Hell yea.. My SECOND friggin' time oversleeping in this week!!

Okay, thankfully I have got a mom who would step in and scream my name till I wake...

Anyway, I went to the 'Diving Medicine and Diver Safety Seminar' held in TTSH last evening.

The first speaker, Dr. Teo was humorous in his talk, but the second speaker, Stephen (President of SUF) wasn't as humorous, so it kinda made his talk monotonous. Nevertheless, he's quite pleasant looking. That gave him my attention! LOL

The review of the talk can be found in my Multiply here.

And...... this (below) is irritating!!!!

(too small?) Its "No smoking in St James" followed by map of the smoking rooms... DUH! But oh well, its been a long long time since I last clubbed. Now go for sports and simple chillouts (like last Sunday??).

Alright, it's only 2.5months more to HOLIDAY! And then so many things planned... Was thinking of Dayang (jul) or Perhentian (aug) sometime soon.. before the BIG holiday! So you see, I'm totally broke. But I guess it's all worthwhile. =)

Bothering or not?

B.

I have been mentally drained... T.o.t.a.l.l.y..
So much so, I actually overslept this morning for work.
It isn't that I couldn't get to sleep, in fact, I doze off VERY fast every nights.
But because my mind hasn't been resting, thus, the insufficient sleep.

Yeah peeps.. I heard something last night... That Lester is now married.
Officially legally married to a lady whom he dated for less than a year.
It didn't affect me but was just 'shocked'.
I felt happy for him, but at the same time, puzzled.

My life 'seems to be' at stagnant point.

Is it because I have been staying home too much recently that I felt something amiss?
But I'm still pretty occupied with my time! Hardly have time to even chill in my own room reading magazines!

What have I been doing??
I think if I have more marnies, I would have accomplished more things that I wanted to.

What is bothering me I don't even know.

Seems like nothing is bothering me.

Or rather, everything is bothering me!

*shrugs* Is it or not?

I didn't like uncertainties yet everything in the world is uncertainties.
But why do people I care for, give me uncertainties as well?
I need an answer.
Or prolly... It is just me who refuse to accept the answers.

B.

"In life - it's not about whose muffins are bigger, but which is tastier."

I should concentrate in improving the recipe than to dwell why my muffin so small.

Then again, I have been very occupied. No idea why.

i am a sailor!

A.

It could not be any better.. Besides the horrigible tannlines (again!) and elbow bleeding and nearly a need for painkillers (for my left arm that was sooo strained) before I sleep, everything else was G.R.E.A.T.!

And you bet! I even got yummy Fresh strawberries and one huge Jambu to weclome me back on shore! Not forgetting the photowhoring sessions.. All these aint possible without Fred Corine and Jon! Thanks and I love you all!!

We were late for lesson. No bus lar. YF, we miss you!! haha. Took Mercs to class. I thought it was a good sign for us passing our exams. Hohoho. No scientific research though. LOL.

Written test was given just few minutes after we stepped in. More than 8 wrongs and its considered FAIL. I was still wondering can I even get 8 correct! In the end, I got 4 wrongs and Fred has 2 wrongs. Not bad eh.

Time to rig up!! Under the hot sorching sun. We both sweat like we just had a bath (not together hor!!!) and dint wipe dry. Gosh. Dying of heat sia... Chopchop and head for lunch, in my bikini (too hot!).

We did the Triangle course and Man Overboard course. Both passed for both of us! Heh^^

Instructor: (threw a life jacket in the sea, reckon me sail away and uturn back)

Me: (sail sail sail away and uturn back)

Instructor: ok, come close... touch the lifejacket

Me: (sailed close and boat buang the jacket) (smiling away I did it!)

Instructor: Eh! not the boat touch la, YOU touch!! Imagine u are trying save the poor guy in water, you use boat knock him meh?

Me: Tsk *embarrassed* sigh

And its a curse, everytime I see Fred capsize, I laughed and I will capsized in an even uglier way. WHY AM I CURSED?!! And oops, I did it again. He was doing dry capsize (boat capsized but sailor didnt get wet by climbing) and I laughed and the next minute I know, I did a turnturtle capsize. zzz... URGH! My boat was TOTALLY UPSIDEDOWN! Best of all, my daggerboard (the essential part for recovering boat during all capsizes) slipped out!

I was brave enough to dive underneath and feel the daggerboard and slot it back underwater with my hands and feet, IN THE STORM. I was sooooo frigging proud I did it! And managed to recover boat, but because of the storm, soon after I recover the boat, it immediately like 0.2349797584174 seconds capsized AGAIN!! Wahlaoz. But not turnturtle, phew.

And then my darlings arrived.. No need to bore you people with words liao, let the pictures (even though they are downsized) do the talking!!

A nice view to start off with?::

ME Sailing!::

My Sailing buddy, Fred!!::I think the sailors didnt like me.. I'M ALL ALONE out in the sea!!::

Awwww... like a babe, cos backview. zzz ::

And so, its weird my buddy looks cool frm the back too (LOL)::Fred posing for picture::Yippee, my turn my turn::We were using all our strength and brains to think and feel the wind while people are.... Jet skiing... How nice...Just before packing up, Fred has a nice nice chill and I was struggling to heave to (sailing term of parking/stationery)!!! I kept getting drifted away. UNFAIR. Left is me, Right is Fred::Oh okok, this is me tacking to get back to shore::ALERT!! EMPTY BOAT SPOTTED! abandoned boat!! (leftmost)::Ta-da!! Me la.. Jumped off the boat abit TOO early, puzzled my photographers. LOL::Then I got marked. "So short still want to go so deep." Brrrgh.. Instructor Soon Chung kept saying me leh! When I launch also say same things!!

See la?!! Now panting to get back, "finning without fins" dragging the boat back to shore. Uncle Soon Chung pity this short girl so helped abit.. zz.. ::

It's unrigging time!!!::Actually you guys aint supposed to glare hard at the parts of the sailboard ya? You guys are supposed to check out my legs!! Wooowweeee~ Ok, its enough, i heard jeerings.

Fine fine, check out my buddy then!!::

But I have to say again, check out my legs!! Muahahaha. Dragging boat to wash area::

After washing, welcomed by Jambu and Strawberries!! It's photowhoring::Check out my.... ok, you guys know what I want to say liao..::Then it's time to wash ourselves up before debrief lesson. And because of all those girls from Kayaking, shower room is FULL! I took the courage to bring my shower gel and head to (boats) washing area with long hoses for shower. And then, I made wrong conversation....

Me: Kayak girls took up the entire shower room, anyway wats fun for kayak sia?
(Uncle James is Pico Sailing instructor)
James: Kayak you havent tried how you know leh?
Me: Can go fast ar?
James: Yes!! They ride the waves! Go and learn mah..
Me: Aiya, like nothing much
(Note: keyword:: "nothing much")
James: *laughs loudly* The guy beside you is kayaking coach and u say like that?
Me: HUH?! never warn me......
Kayak Coach: Ya la. Kayak not fun meh? I must have "kayak" written on forehead ar?
Me: no lar.. okok, next time I try kayak lor..
(me hurriedly go off!! muahahaha)

Decided, the above is wrong PR. -sobs-

"Eve, dont anyhow take my picture huh?!! I shy la *act^act*" ?Yes, the entire class heard him.

Shiet la! Always got caught by Uncle SoonChung for whatever I do!! Man~ He notices me too much!! Anyway, this is him... Master sailor wor!

And when I was filling up a form while he was giving speech, I heard.... "See like Eve, she looks like under 18, but SHE'S NOT"... URGH!! WHY??!!! I think they love me, seriously. ME AGAIN!

And Uncle SC said, 70% who came to the course would not ever turn up again... For me, because I have a Freddy buddy (ryhme eh?), I think I would be falling in the 30% category.

But all's worthwhile..... We had satisfying dinner and chill out to end the day.

Look at our respective main courses!!::But my smoked salmon sucks.. (threw them away)::And my Vodka Orange looks ssooooo pathetic..::And then, shifted to the beach benches, shiok::the loving Fam-Yew couple (so envious lar, tsk. I want a boyfriend!!!)::OOOHHhhh.. not forgetting the Fondue!! With extra strawberries from Corine!!::And then (dont know call him bored or creative) this pic.... Can anyone guess its main object?::In the end, i became the object as well for the meaningless shots. LOL::Thats me, fYI.

I reached home at a freaking 11pm+!! Was out of house for more than 15hrs!! GOsh!

More blueblacks::

And the almost-recovering-wound became all-over-again wound::

Cool? And TV Mobile featured the restaurant we dined in just after we left the place. I think we are cool dudes, hanging in cool places, doing cool stuff and sports. Muahaha!

F.

I am just as irritated as earlier on. Nothing improves.

I received my $5 off Olio Dome Voucher. But that is not my objective, my aim is win that N95!!
THIS CONTEST! Yeah, draw is just before my birthday.. Could it be my birthday pressie?

And Look at this!! SWAROVSKI PLUTO's CHARM!!! WOW!!!
But I think I like FISH PENDANT more..

And check this out.. my love!! Buckle Bracelet!

Haiya.. finished dreaming, back to reality... ZZZzzz

It's weekends and it means Sailing. :)

something is...

C.

... bothering me.... But I do know what it is.

After the little thoughts on the BBQ last night while watching teebee and probably the reason to why no conclusion surfaced, had a conclusion this morning though. For the sake of some reason, I have to give it a go.

But wondered why do I face reluctance and uneasiness on... not the outcome nor the decision...

That is why, something is bothering me, but I do not know what it is.
Yet, I just want to get out of it.

Oh ya, I promised the Eggy Story? So..

It happened when I was vexing over something that I should have let go long time ago. So my wonderful girlfriend said she understands the eggy situation I was in. She said.. Egg white and egg yolk mix together, very hard to seperate, means M.E.S.S.Y.. So I came up with..

Egg Equation: Egg white + Egg Yolk = Messy
(hard to seperate)

And then reaslised, she was just trying to joke, trying hard to make me laugh. But then... I didnt laugh and in fact, subconciously, we have been describing 'Messy' as 'In-the-Egg-Situation'.

And because I didnt know what I was being bothered about, hence, my MSN nick shows... "Where is THE egg?" I do not know who is the White and who is the Yolk.
It's just bothersome!

And this funny woman, sent me a webby that shows.. The facial expressions of women! Very interesting!! Take a good laugh!

.. and then take heart. The men's are much easier....

Craps but how true!!

AND..!! Been thinking toooooo much that is causing fatigue. More and more people of my age are getting married! Mom and him said the same thing, had I not been into diving, I should be now not-in-town with my husband and baby.. *ouch!* I start to wonder... Am I now ready or not, for relationship?

SO..!! Yep, I'd better put on my running shoes and start my healthy lifestyle from next Monday onwards, provided if I didnt get too much aches for Sunday Sailing.

One more week to..................... NO SMOKING.

Time flies and the "can can"

-

"can"
"can can"
"CAN"
"happy?"
"you all happy then can lo"
"happier now?"
"hahahahahaha"

Ya. I said out that deadly word. And I said it like.... more than once. *shake head*
I'm beginning to feel the weight of "can". Gosh.

I never knew it could be this hard to just attend a BBQ session. I have always love BBQ. But this time it's different. It should be more fun, since it is going to be held at a fish farm, but on the contrast, this is soooo tensed.

Hownowbrowncow???

Yes, I gotten over the issue, in fact I shouldnt get so worked out since its already the THIRD time he flared at me for no concrete justifications. But once bitten, twice shy. So what if I turn up? I would not have the freedom to speak. Any joke misunderstood is a war. So what I dont turn up? BBQ still goes on.

Shrugs. Let me worry for this coming theory and practical tests first. All others can wait.

And best of all, I will be the last to join again IF im going. That is a nightmare. I am going to disrupt their plannings and whatsoever again?? Urgh. Then why should the rest insist I turn up? I know everyone's intention (thanks..) but who understands my position? In fact, this "bbqATfishfarm" idea was from me. I am now being invited to a gathering where I was the one to come up the idea with.

Probably no one knows it hurts pretty much when you have the good intentions but backfired. Then filled your head with all question marks. Well...

*breatheeee...*

Time really flies.. While I packed my book shelf, I happened to see HOTSTUFF of issue 40. That was like 1.5yrs ago? And I flipped till...... Yeah. I am on the page. I miss the days. I do. I miss him, too.

And this clip is the compilation of the photoshoots over the 3 years. I only took part in one. :)
Happy viewing.

I will be back.

A.

Tsk. These two kukus better stop poke poke me.

kuku1: (threw one piece of hand drawn map by kuku2 to me)
me: Huh? what is this?
kuku1: see if you know how to get to the boat.

Map depicts jetty, boat, square box, etc

me: why cant the frigging boat go to the jetty to pick us all up leh?
kuku1: *looks up* (dont know to cry or laugh)
kuku2: *looks up in disbelief* this is a wreck la!
me: oh.. wreck say wreck la, wahlao, boat?
kuku1 and kuku2: if this Horlan Queen can get to the wreck, means kuku2 pass.

Which I did! Haha. How hard can it be? Or maybe kuku2 was good, in mapping. Keep it up!!

Woo.. and I'm thoroughly aching.. Aches and bruises and bleedings... From Sailing. How to take practical test this Sunday? Damn.

And I have to head to Richmond someday.. Hmm.. Yeah, probably Fred was right, what I need is GPS not Wi-Fi. :( Where is Richmond?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh ya

Hilarious... a conversation.

I took my heartbeat rate with a..... heartbeatmeter? Whatever-you-call-that
It shows.. 185 beats/min then 215 beats/ min.
Wahlao, am I dead?? I thought my average is only 120 beats/min?? I know, very fast, but that is my normal.

Me: Sian, why my heart beat reads so fast even when I'm relaxed?
XXX: Ya man. Then you better dont have sex.
Me: ............
XXX: Later beat lagi fast then heart attack. Suddenly stop during the play.
Me: ............

So, Roy, dont die on me on the trip. Please make sure you keep warm. So you wont suddenly hug me underwater, my heart beats very fast, may not be able to take it hor.

And this morning, LSO very funny, asked me on a trip. With 184cm men X4. So if I ask HIM along, average is 183cm is it? Although I craze about 183club but not like that right??

I am feeling like a dwarf..
There are better ways to make me inferior. You people. KUDOs.

I shouldnt have joined..

F.

...Yes, I shouldnt have..

I thought my presence could be fun to them, but..

I cried in office. Now dying to dry my tears so I can continue to work. zzz. I felt so farking unwelcomed all of a sudden.

Now I feel like slapping myself for REALLY being buttside itchy wanna join in the fun.
Slap slap!!!

Suddenly got accused of so many things.. I didnt bother whether the mails were to me or to the rest as well, I just broke down in tears... Like tapwater neh!! Faints. So many till I cant catch and just toppled off. Head landing.

I guess my good intentions to keep everyone excited in the anticipation just backfired. I guess I could no longer keep up to suggest BBQ or gatherings for them, with thought of building up even closer rapport before going. I think I failed big time. LOSER.

To think I was excited. Started dreaming to go Vince's farm since Roy and I have never been there. Then thought BBQ might be more convenient. I think I am excited and not... WE are excited. Ha. It must have been a joke. *audience laugh*

I didnt know I created so much troubles. I think my goodwill actions seemed BIG TIME redundance.

Was pretty disappointed that this email that I started turned out this way, and of course, with some who took my intentions the negative ways and came darting me. I remembered how excited I was yesterday keep emphasizing to Fred during sailing, "Gosh, less than 3 months only leh!" and jumped with joy.

So dear Roy, want to die, we must die together. LOL. Meaning, dont want to die right? So we stay close and come back alive. We must behave ourselves. Ok ok, I treat you ice cream rewarding you for accompany me to be the Extras. I'm sorry. :"(

Right now, no more funny jokes. And no more redundant efforts. I think thats the best I can do :) I already felt bad enough to have annoyed everyone... Sigh

On a brighter note, Hey!! Kukus!!! China man didnt drool at me hor!!! Create stories. @#%*(!&*& Stil dare to spread. On a second thought, drool about me can, but cannot just drool for my rashie only!! Its me who made the rashie looks good hor! Hehe *giggles*

Thanks Esther for laughing at me crying in office and TRYING so hard to create jokes that isnt funny at all. LOL. Stupid egg joke. I will remember!

Drained out weekend

A.

I am soooo soooo friggin' tired from the sailing that I now can only blog in pointforms.

Saturday::

- Woke early to shop in Kembangan alone

- Very funny, realised never jot down address

- Mobile died on me, cant sms ask address

- Rained sibeh heavy

- One came to rescue

- Survived

- Mild depression from spending close to $200

- Nuah at Swensens, Hallo icecream

- To Boon Keng

- To Serangoon dinner

- Wanted ask him too, but know he wont appreciate

- Hallo icecream, again

- homesweethome comfortably

Sunday::

Sunday abit better, can let pictures do the talking..

- Woke even earlier than working days

- Took 1.5hr journey ride

- Forgot gloves, big time shiet

Hallo Sailing::

Me and my Sailboat::

My buddy, Fred and his sailboat::

My another buddy, Yingfong and his sailboat::

The happy THREEs::

Peeps, I love my rashguard, r.e.a.l.l.y.!::

This is Pico, I do Laser::

Fred & I 'eat snake'::

..While Yingfong worked hard..::

Kpo people fishing::

You decided, hunks or not::

Pamper ourselves with good dinner::

Back with injuries...::

The only happy thing I got from the 2hrs torture in the sea was.... the sunburnt on my cheeks. Very natural rosy now. (???????)